I don't know if I spend to much time by myself, too much time thinking and thinking and thinking. I think I attact a certian type of person. Someone damanged, someone in need of repair. I have spent countless hours helping these friends. I know they won't take my advice, but I know talking about it helps. I know any issue is a process, takes time.
I find myself saying I have shitty friends a lot. I casually tell my husband "so and so cancelled again" and neither of us are suprised.
I tell my husband, I have shitty friends, and he agrees.
I am wondering if I bring it on myself? I wish I had someone I could talk to, all the hours I pour into other people, they are never there to reciprocate. Do I shut down when the conversation turns to me? Do I not think i am worthy of help?
Hubby told me to stop being a martyar. I've started being aware of self sacrifice and how it's counter productive.
I get so annoyed when any number of friends will email, or msg saying "i feel like a bad friend" then expect it to be all better. Well, yes you are a bad friend, so you need to do more than just state it and expect it to be better!
I don't want to throw away decades of friendship because I am mad, but it feels like i'll reach a breaking point and say fuckit.
hubby is reaching a point where he doesn't want to hear me talk about certian people because it pisses him off that it hurts me.
I am done. I don't want to be the one to always keep in touch, pisses me off.
